Friday, January 25, 2019

What's Up?: Where I've Been The Past Month

Hello out there beautiful people, and happy New Year! If your still here thank you for sticking with me peeps! I have taken a small month sabbatical you could say to get my priorities straight and to figure out where I want to take this blog in the new year. I have been really focusing on making healthy changes in my life by exercising, getting more strict with my portion control, cutting down on alcohol consumption, and just overall making healthier changes. I'm going to get real and vulnerable with you about how bad I let myself get...

I woke up the day after Christmas and realized that I needed to make changes because the path that I was on was not only not sustainable but not healthy. I looked in the mirror and stepped on the scale and realized that I let myself spiral out of control. My body was not healthy at all, I was 20 pounds over what would be considered healthy BMI for my height and 50 for my body type!! Yes, 50 fricken pounds people!

This made me feel almost guilty because I have the education on what changes I need to make but I was so blind to what I was doing to myself. Nothing made me happy and I was drinking half a bottle of wine every single night. This is so nasty...but my binges would consist of 2 large Wendy's french fries, a bag of Gardein Chicken Tenders drenched in hot sauce and dairy-free ranch, and 3 glasses of wine! I was letting that be my comfort because I wasn't happy where I was at. I always say that changes won't be made if you don't take action, but I was literally stagnant like a deer in head lights. Thinking back to this it literally brings me to tears at how much happier I could feel if I just changed a few things. I think I'm more ashamed than anything else, but I know that is what comforted me at the time.

In March it will be 2 years since I lost a really good friend, and I think I let that loss push me further into myself. When he was alive I would get dinner and drinks with him at least once a week and then all the sudden he was gone. I don't make friends easily so it meant a lot to me that he was putting the same amount of effort into a friendship as I was. I don't think I let myself really mourn in a healthy way and I just added more and more activities to my day to day. I had a full-time job where I was the boss, a was going to school full-time taking 5 classes, doing an internship, and clinical experience and it was just too much. Looking back I think it taught me that my limit to what I can accomplish is very high but would I do it all again and that much....Hell NO!

So I am glad to say that I have been exercising, eating way healthier with minimal alcohol consumption, and drinking way more water for the past 3 weeks. Not that weight is the end all be all, I would just like to be the healthiest me I can be. I have actually lost 6 pounds so far! I feel like I have way more energy and feel so much more connected and awake to the present. I actually feel much happier and less agitated and feel like I can get so much more done during the day. I know the changes I need to make and now that I have accepted where I'm at its all about action.

I don't think I have ever really been at the peak of healthiness but I have always had a passion about eating healthily...possibly not in the right portions...but you get the gist. I followed a vegan diet for 3 years and recently within the past 6 months added seafood back into my diet, just because I felt like I was craving it. I follow a plant-based dominant diet, and I still don't consume any other animal products other than local honey every once in a while. When I was younger people even called me a health nut, let be clear...this was only related to nutrition. In high school I did Track and Field (Field...shockput and disquis...because I'm not about the running life), and a short stint on the dance team (besides ballet and cheerleading when I was younger...I'm NOT a skilled dancer). Exercise has alway seemed foreign to me and I have never really given it the dedication and focus it deserves.

I have decided that I'm going to start blogging and sharing my health and fitness journey on the blog along with my regular content. Some of you may know that I have a Bachelors degree in Nutrition and Dietetics but if not, guess what...I do. I'm not a dietitian because I haven't completed my Internship or sat for my boards but I do have a pretty hefty education in the health and nutrition space. If you haven't noticed I have also added a new tab to the top of my blog labeled health and wellness.

There are a couple things going on with a family member right now as well and I felt it was better to dedicate my time in assisting that person to get better, but I'm back. Lately I have just felt removed from the whole Instagram and blogging scene and felt like it was just not healthy for me to continue going at the rate I was a going.  I was obsessed with followers, likes, and comments and that has nothing to do with my self worth. I think that was just promoting the unhealthy behaviors I was doing and just needed to take a break. Self worth comes from within and I'm dedicated to focusing on myself inside and out this year. If you have any blog posts your interested in me writing please let me know in the comments below, or if you feel more comfortable you can send me an email at

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